Not fleeing an EP keg party, sign of the times?
Underage drinking and curfew violations were handed out in Canutillo this weekend after kids failed to flee a keg party when Sheriff’s deputies busted in. “Those lazy bastards don’t even give us a chase anymore. It’s as if they don’t care or have lost all their desire to be a drunken teenager in El Paso. The blame can possibly be put on their parents, the ongoing violence in Juarez, even our economy,” sheriff’s spokesman Deputy Jesse Tovar said.
Whatever the reason, El Paso Sheriff’s deputies have started a program to educate teenagers on the importance of fleeing a party once cops and sheriffs arrive. ‘Kids and Kegs’ will begin this week going to high schools in the area, possibly even some middle schools. Tovar said that lower valley schools would be exempt from the presentation. According to program officials McGruff the Crime Dog and FAH-Q the EPPD’s new talking interactive robot will be joining the already stellar cast of speakers. “Sometimes we even give them time to have fun, we show up well after the party has started, even when we know in advance that a party is going to go down. You should see the gay promotional flyers that they make. These little pricks are going to give us some excitement whether they like it or not,” said Tovar.
The ‘euro’ car that was impounded belonged to Byron J. Montelongo, a senior at Canutillo High School. “With gas prices so high, and chicks not putting out at the rate they used to, I just wanted to relax and would hope the cops could respect that. Now I’m screwed, I got no car to flee in, if I chose to flee,” he said. City and county officials were on vacation and unavailable for comment.
-C. Senor
Avocadoan Canutillo Mobile Newsroom
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