avocadoan.com

You Voted Your Little Hearts Out

Avocadoanian — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 05:14:53 +0000

Funny things occur on primary election night in El Paso, Texas. Let’s name a few. A dud, yes a dud named Larry Medina, received 10% of the votes even after he tried removing his name from the ballot and wanted out of the race. Gilbert Sanchez, another dud who has been named in the biggest corruption scandal in El Paso’s history ransacked his race and is taking it to a runoff. Seriously, El Pasoans, and you want people in Austin to pay attention to us? If Norma Favela can’t beat him we’re moving to Juarez. Nobody should get in Veronica Escobar’s way. Jaime O, your Leprechaun butt is gonna get cooked. David K got his ass whipped by a Mickey-D’s lovin’ briefcase losing career politician. Expect a blog post on that in the morning. Norma Chavez couldn’t be beat, so we kept hearing. Naomi Gonzalez has her crying on her ice sculptures and bevo burgers. Antonio “Tony” San Roman, the “Cuuuulero” chants can’t be louder for you tonight. We’d like to end this by saying, “Leave Theresa ALOOOOONE!!!!”

-Avocadoan Staff

“Put it to a vote!” “She’ll never be beat!”

Avocadoanian — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 04:34:05 +0000

Those are among the things that small minded individuals have been spouting lately in EP. Can any of you feel that? It’s people organizing, it’s wheels in motion. It’s called a movement. Smells good, don’t it? This movement is for anybody who feels that some elected officials in El Paso have been dead weight and have not represented Jack, and his homegirl. This movement is for anybody who feels that El Paso is on the cusp of greatness without the leaders we need to get us there. This movement is your movement. Elected officials are not supposed to rot in their position or turn it into a career. They are supposed to work, then let somebody else follow in their footsteps. This is for anybody who is tired of corruption; this movement is about to explode violently. Can’t wait. There’s a sleeping giant in El Paso.

-Avocadoan Staff

Juarez Bars, from the Torta-slingin’ Strip to EP

Avocadoanian — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 04:27:33 +0000

There is a few bars that some of us at The ‘Cadoan frequented in our youthful days, those bars were in Juarez of course; when we were still too young to drink in El Paso.

We are starting to notice something, though. A few of these bars with the same names are opening in El Paso. We do not dare try to find out if the original establishments are still open across the border, drug warfare and all of that. We would rather not take our chances. It is not a coincidence that these bars are popping up, it is just odd that nobody is talking about it.

The bars:

The News
33 (”Treinta y Tres”)
Pockets
Es Tragos

There is probably more than we know of. If you have info email us at staff@avocadoan.com.

-Staff

Dancing Days Are Here Again

Avocadoanian — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 02:04:03 +0000

- dan from the Strelz Board

This Is Just Too Gay

Avocadoanian — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 19:03:04 +0000

Couldn’t come up with a better title, some ideas were:

Gays Need Someone Who is Gay to Speak on Their Behalf

Non-Gays Really Letting Their Gay Hair Down

In the meantime, two new bridges have now been built to cross between the US and Mexico. One on the west side and one in the Riverside HS area. Half of the lanes are closed. People overwhelmingly agree, they’d rather not care about the bridges as long as Chico’s stays gayfree. Ok, that was bullshit but here we go.

Let’s just get a few things straight, oops.

A lot of the opinions had a central theme.

“If they were straight I’d still be offended.” Let’s be honest, no you wouldn’t.

If you paid attention to somebody before they were kissing, then you would pay attention to them when they started kissing. That being said, if you didn’t pay attention to a gay/straight couple before they started kissing then you wouldn’t pay attention to them if they started kissing. Get it?

Kissing does not get you noticed.

In this day and age, how is there no video or audio of the entire incident?

EPPD, Police Academy 7 - The Rise of Mahoney, needs to finally leave the rookie excuse behind (oops).

Patricia, just let somebody else handle it (oops).

Ramon Renteria’s article has now been taken off of the El Paso Times site. Word on the street is that he was last seen eating fishsticks at Crave.

EDIT: Renteria’s article is back online.

When did Chico’s become a ‘family joint’ after clubbing/barhopping? Overnight?

Going to be interesting to see what the facts show.

-John ElGuey

Hell Hath No Fury Like A Gay Man Scorned

Avocadoan Staff — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 23:18:00 +0000

That is what the legendary Chico’s Tacos may have to fear.

As the gay community in El Paso has made efforts to make its presence felt, an incident at Chico’s may have started a whole new ballgame.

Since El Paso isn’t homophobic enough, security guards at El Paso’s beloved taco chain and the police department may have provided a reminder.

While Chico’s is staying mum, the El Paso Police Department is chalking the incident up to a rookie mistake.

The incident has even attracted the attention of blogger Perez Hilton.

While there is still some he said, he said going on, El Pasoans speculate over whether El Paso’s gay community will retaliate by making Chico’s the new OP.

Oh, how this town loves the spotlight.

-A Staff

Castro’s Last Gasp and The MelinaMobile

Avocadoanian — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 04:38:56 +0000

Ex-Rep, Melina Castro, had one more trick up her thong. These billboards were strategically placed around the Northeast last Friday, a day before the runoff, after news broke that Luther Jones and Gilbert Sanchez had been indicted.

The famed MelinaMobile, in all it’s glory.

-Avocadoan Staff

Pickett Hits It; Does Not Quit It

Avocadoanian — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 14:47:50 +0000

From: link

Somebody has been passing more than laws.

-Staff

Pixy Studios to host 2009 Summer Photo Series

Avocadoan Staff — Thu, 28 May 2009 03:26:07 +0000

Local photography studio Pixy Studios will be hosting four free events through June and July at 309 E. Franklin, 79901. Receive a free gift at each event; RSVP is recommended.

June 13: Mini-Fashion Shoot for 2010 Seniors

June 27: “Trash the Dress;” wear a formal dress and trash it

July 11: “Baby Cakes;” Bring you children 6 and under to have some fun with an extra large cupcake

July 25: “In the Box;” Try their newest prop for free and receive a free gift

Cacamole 5/27/2009: Capitol “Hills” and Gay People

Avocadoan Staff — Thu, 28 May 2009 03:18:28 +0000

Our apologies for the constipation.

In an attempt to mimic Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag/Pratt of MTV’s The Hills, there is drama brewing on Capitol Hill.

Reps. Marisa Marquez and Norma “I finally graduated college” Chavez are apparently feuding. The use of extremely shitty typing in the text message might be Chavez’s attempt at dumbing down (or possibly up) to show her constituents she is just like them. OMG.

On a related note, expect David K. to write another “I hate Norma” post regarding the topic soon. And if the article ends up on Newspaper Tree, expect him to blog about it being on Newspaper Tree.

In other drama, it is rumored that the oh-so-divisive issue of gay marriage may result in two opposite parts of El Paso uniting. In response to the demonstration held in favor of gay rights Downtown, the ignorant and uneducated conservatives of El Paso’s East Side (or as its residents call it, East Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiyud!!!) and Lower (Mission) Valley have realized they have something in common with the WASPy, religious zealots of the West Side. “We don’t agree on much, or anything at all, but we’re all insecure when it comes to gay people we don’t even know getting married,” said one member of the potential alliance.